Easy Transitions…Saying Goodbye to your Child

Welcome Back!  School is officially in session. We are looking forward to our new students joining us tomorrow.  But, saying goodbye can be hard.  As excited as we all might be about school it can be difficult to say goodbye.  Separation anxiety is a normal part of the routine and we would like to offer some tips that might be helpful…

1. Prepare  your child.  Be sure to help them understand what they can expect.  Talk about how the routine will go… “We will walk to your cubby first and put your things away.  Then, I will remind you where to find the bathroom and then I’ll take you to the door of your classroom.  Your teacher will meet us there and we will give one hug, one kiss and one high five and then I will leave.”
2. Don’t be surprised if your child is having a difficult time even if they are returning to the same classroom, with the same teachers, and the same peers.
3. Stick to your routine!  A change in routine can make separation anxiety even more intense for a child.  If you say you are going to give one hug, one kiss and one high five, DO IT!  Drawing out the goodbye not only makes it hard but also hinders your child’s ability to develop confidence that you are both really expected to do what you say.
4. Refrain from entering the classroom.  We try to give our students the first 6 weeks to make the environment “theirs” and develop a routine before inviting parents inside.  If you have questions about how or what your child is doing be sure to ask their teacher at the end of the day.  Or, feel free to call our office and we will check in on your child.  But, trust your child that they can develop the skills to make it through their school day.
5. Stay calm and let your child know you trust them.  Although you might be concerned that your child is going to have a hard transition, be sure to express your confidence in them.  If you aren’t comfortable leaving campus until you know they are doing okay, you are welcome to hang out in our lobby and our staff will check on your child.  Or, give us a call on the phone and we will be happy to check.
6. Keep it short. Avoid lingering…this can cause further distress. Rest assured that if your child is unable to settle or remains distraught, we will call you.  It is important to us that your child feels this is a safe and peaceful place.  If they need a shorter day here in order to build that confidence, we will support them.
7. Give it time.  It can take up to 6 weeks for children to “normalize.”  If you have concerns that it is taking your child too long to adjust, be sure to speak with the teachers. They might have some good ideas to help you both.
8. Return on time.  It can be difficult for children to build trust if their parent and/or teacher tell them that mommy or daddy will “be here soon” and you are not.  If you are going to be late, give us a call so we can prepare your child.  Unexpected events occur and we are happy to support you and your child so call our office if you are running late.
9. Show your child that you trust the teachers.  If they feel that you lack confidence in the teachers or the school, they will also lack confidence.  Again, if you have concerns about your child’s care, please speak with the teachers or administration.
10. Ask your child about their day. Let them express frustrations but also ask specific questions that might lead them to remember the good parts of their day.  “Did you play in the sandbox today?”  “Did your teacher read any stories today?  What was the story about?”
11. Most importantly – be consistent!